June Favorites: Beauty

 

Items Shown:

1. Urban Decay Baked Bronzer, 'Toasted'

2. NARS Blush, 'Lovejoy'

3. Ultraflesh Ultra Gloss, 'Heat'

4. Oscar Blandi 'Pronto' Dry Shampoo

5. Lancome Effacernes Waterproof Concealer

6. Boots no.7 Intelligent Balance Mousse Foundation Shade 20 'Blonde'

7. L'oreal Lineur Intense Carbon Black 

You'd think to jump for a shimmer bronzer in the summer, but a matte bronzer provides the natural glow to look like you're actually tan as opposed to wearing a shiny product. This gives your skin the actually beachy look as opposed to the 'I'm trying to look beachy' cakey bronzed appearance. Dust a slight amount on the highest points on your face where the sun would hit, as well as your neck, shoulders and decollete to appear tanner!

Add the shimmer with your blush! 'Lovejoy' by NARS used as a blush contour is GORGEOUS in the summer- the shade itself is a tawny bronze, only a shade up from a bronzer. It's a slight flush with a tiny bit of shimmer to give you that natural, sunkissed finish.

This sheer red gloss by Ultraflesh plumps your lips (without pain!) and adds a sheer tint that looks great in the sun. It's moisturizing, which is a BIG plus in the summer (your lips are already drying out from the heat- you can replenish them with the gloss! Like a chapstick and color combined in one)

Dry Shampoo is a year round must, but ESPECIALLY in the summer! Most days I want to get up and get outside- this powder makes your hair look first day fresh without multiple steps. This is also a GREAT product for colored blondes who can't make it to the salon- it lightens your dark roots!

Lancome Effacernes concealer is great because it's waterproof- meaning sweatproof as well! It won't look as if it has faded from your face after an hour in the sunshine!

I love matte foundations- boots no 7 has been my favorite find this year! You might not automatically think matte is a good idea in the summer- but why add any shine to your face with a dewy moisturizer when you're going to be out in the heat? I like to stay matte and only add shimmer where I want it as opposed to looking like I'm sweating the moment I step out of the house!

Finally, this liquid liner by L'oreal is amazing for summer! SO many of you recommended this to me, && I'm so thankful you did! It's got AMAZING staying power && has yet to smudge on me!

To watch the full video review, as well as see my favorites for style this summer watch the video!

 

What I'm Wearing in this Video:
1. Sheer Open Robe: Urban Outfitters
2. Brown tank: Abercrombie && Fitch
3. Earrings: Betsey Johnson
4. Rose Cuff: TJ Maxx
5. Nails: Essie 'Blanc'
6. Makeup: Listed above (the favorites!) with NARS Dolce Vita gloss as a stain and Alahambra shadow duo with 'galapagos' as crease color


Let me know if you have any other ultimate summer favorite products && how you like to wear them!

Dear Diary #5

    

I hate that I hate you
because to hate something means you still have feelings for it.

The Best Summer Shorts && Short Trends

Items Shown (Linked Where Available)

1. Patchwork Short: Mossimo, Target

2. Floral Short: Mossimo, Target

3. Silk Short: Express

4. Blue Denim: Hudson, Nordstroms

5. High Waist Button Up Short: Windsor

6. High Waist Tie Waist: Sparkle&Fade, Urban Outfitters

For the full review on how each pair fits, tips for your shape && what to wear them with- watch the video:

What I'm Wearing in this video:
Jacket: IRO (Shown in this style post and on this lookbook post)
Foundation: Boots No.7 Intelligent Balance Mousse in No. 20 Blonde
Bronzer: Urban Decay Baked in Toasted
Blush: NARS Lovejoy
Eyes: NARS Alahambra && Galapagos
Liner: L'Oreal Lineur Intense Carbon Black
Mascara: Lancome L'Oscillation
Lips: NARS Mitzi && UltraFlesh Heat
Nails: Essie Blanc
Earrings: Betsey Johnson

How to: Duotone Summer Glowing Blush

Duo Tone or Two Tone Blush is great for the summer-

I like the soft gradient 'sunset' look on the cheeks as a fresh change to my normal

makeup routine, and using a darker blush as a contour is less harsh than a contrasting bronzer

The two blushes I used were NARS Dolce Vita (powder) and NARS cactus flower:

This is also a great way to wear cream blush without feeling like your face

is sliding off in the heat- put a teeny bit on your apples to give the sheer cream glow,

while the powder blends back into your cheekbone to complete the look!

OOTD: My summer trend- Open Maxi Dresses

What I'm Wearing:

1. Sheer Lace Maxi: Free People, Small

2. White tank: Abercrombie&&Fitch, Extra Small

3. Destroyed Short: Ruehl, 0
4. Hook && Eye Elastic Belt: c/o Windsorstore.com

5. Strap Heel: Hautelook, Size 9

6. Rose Cuff: TJ Maxx

7. Pendants: Assorted Drusy pieces

8. Crystal Chain: Nordstroms

9. Sunglasses: Gucci

10. Manicure: Chanel 'Steel'

11. Pedicure: Orly 'Rage'

Open Maxi's are my favorite summer look. Look for dresses that have the full button

option (like a slip) so you can create this style. 

This is a great piece to add drama to any outfit but still stay cool in the summer time (it's a full length dress but adds no heat or weight to your outfit!) Also it's great for girls who might be uncomfortable wearing shorter shorts- you can cover up your backside while still having the comfort of easy to wear shorts!

I'll do a full video soon on different style open maxis and what to pieces to pair them with (I especially like to wear patterned shorts with this look!).

Dear Diary #4

      

Everyone likes you when you're successful. 
..But the only ones that matter are the ones who liked you when no one else did.

Dear Diary #3

       
        As time goes on, you begin to romanticize situations in your head. The reasons why you stopped talking, broke up, or left any form of failing relationship seem less negative with each passing day. You forget the small irritations, the daily upsets, and think of the larger, general picture. Once they're reintroduced into your life, you only seem them in these small, happy doses and ultimately you begin to slip back into the comfort of their presence. Time passes, you begin to think that maybe they've changed, and then something happens to shock you back into the reality that it's actually all the same.


        It doesn't have to be a large event that brings this abrupt slap back into reality. Often times it's a poorly worded text or inappropriate joke, but no matter the size of the injury, the damage is the same. You begin to remember that there was indeed a reason, if not fifty, for why you stopped talking in the first place- and that you were as right in those upset feelings then as you are at this very moment.


       The saying is that 'time heals everything', but does it really heal- or does it mask? Is time actually repairing us? Or is it blinding us from the emotional clarity we priorly possessed? Is this time-induced comfort actually an emotional land mine waiting to erupt as we come closer? ..Or am I the only one who continuously repeats her mistakes?


      The best decisions are always made in retrospect- but how is it that we can see our previous choices, remember the pain, and still indulge in these opportunities? Is it the thrill of something 'taboo'? The chance to change our past? ..Or are we simply masochistic?


      How is it that we can know better, but still choose the opposite? Why do we continue to play russian roulette with our emotions based on the 'what if' notion- What if he's different? What if it's changed? ..And what if this is all happening for a reason?


And just when you get lost in the fantasy, something brings you crashing back into reality with all of your questions answered:


He's the same.
It hasn't changed.
It is happening for the same reason it always has-
to remind you that he's not right. It's still not right. It will never be right.
&& to never settle. 

Summer Nail Polish Haul, Swatches && Review

Polishes Pictured:

1. Essie, 'Marshmallow'

2. Essie, 'Kisses && Bises'

3. Essie, 'Marabou'

4. Sally Hansen Complete Salon Manicure, 'First Kiss'

5. China Glaze 'Sugar High'

6. Color Club 'Modern Pink'

7. Color Club 'Youthquake'

8. China Glaze 'Jitterbug'

Essie 'Marshmallow' is a sheer polish. I would only recommend this polish if you have hours
of free time, loads of patience && like the look of bubbled, layered polish! I never understood
the premise of a sheer white- what's the purpose? White is used for french manicures, in styled
looks such as dotting, and for solid nails- none of which would benefit from a sheer cast! What a waste.
I like the color it came to be after a 6 episode long layering session- but I'd search for a similiar
one that takes away fewer hours of your life.

Have yet to use 'Kisses && Bises', but I purchased it just for the sheen on top of a manicure, which is what the sheer polish is meant to be. This looks great on top of a white to create "pearl nails", a
look I think is quite cute this season!

Marabou is a classic ballet pink and is actually one of Essie's opaque colors.
Essie is my absolute favorite polish when it is opaque- I wish they all were that formula!

The Sally Hansen Complete Salon Effects polish formula is one of my favorites.
It stays on extremely well, is opaque && I love the flat brush applicator. The peach
color looks much prettier in person!

Look at the China Glaze polish! Sugar High looks almost red compared to the light, bright pink
it was in the bottle! It's not even darker in the same pink tone, it's completely different! Never
had something look this different before. Have you noticed this with other CG polishes?

I've never used Color Club before but I LOVE these neon bright colors! So fun for summer!
The pink is legitimately the first polish that I can say truly lives up to "Barbie Pink"- in the
bottle, AND on the nail!

I also just purchased Essie's "Turquoise && Caicos"- I saw it so much on Youtube that I finally
decided to purchase it...

I kept it on my nails for a solid six hours.

Sometimes I'm really bad at speaking.. must be a side effect of Bieber fever:

Dear Diary #2

Recently I've converted from analysis to ambivalence, a change I find more confusing than the surrounding situations. I find myself increasingly detached from all sentiment, whether it be from a general disconcert or a subconscious guard of heart. I use to analyze each and every situation for meaning and reason. Now, I find myself not only avoiding such analysis, but also being completely ambivalent to the situation's presence. As you grow older, you come to expect the heartbreak. Promises are meant to be broken, and people are only surprising when they aren't disappointing you. When you're young, you think things get better as you get older. But the truth is you just get better at dealing with them.

The above statement can also be argued as incorrect. Some people completely run from their problems as they age. Since acquiring physical responsibility, it only gets easier to completely regress from social responsibilities. Get in a fight? Walk out. Have a bad day? Drink it away. There's always another door open, and always someone to replace you. The emphasis on real relationships and maintaining emotional integrity fades for some as they enter adulthood. Typically graduation brings jobs, rent && full time responsibilities. The almost instantaneous switch from 'party' to 'professional' sends a shockwave of stress that often ends in a backlash towards anything else that can be considered 'work'. Responsibilities become paramount to relationships, friendships fade, and you're left realizing the depths to which you are truly alone.

I've always felt that my relationships have been different than others. I've never had casual friends with whom you spend weekends out with, or a circle with which you all belonged. I would consider my relationships to be almost intoxicatingly close, an all-consuming entity of sorts. I'd spend hours communicating daily with these individuals and even years living together. I felt as though they physically were a part of me. Now this type of closeness brings joy at the fact that this person understands every little piece of you- every thought, every look. They can tell a difference in your demeanor by the simplest things, from the way you touch your hair to the way you type 'hello'. But this closeness not only brings extreme highs, but also devastating lows. A fall out with someone with whom you've invested entire pieces of your soul feels like the ultimate betrayal, because it is infinitely more personal than a casual difference. Even the simplest fight can feel like a full blown attack against your person. It feels as if they're not only turning on every part of you, but also throwing away each experience you jointly survived. The true pain isn't realizing that what you had is gone, but instead that it can never be replaced.

But what happens when these relationships do in fact resurge? Movies lead us to believe that if a person re-enters your life that it is 'meant to be'. We're shown that these people who return are indeed 'the one' because they came back after being 'set free'. But is it fate ...or is it comfort? Is it love, or is it loneliness? And if it's supposedly so easy, how come it never is?

How do you handle an old relationship resurfacing into your life after you spent so much time carefully patching up all emotional scars from their exit? Do you allow them access with nothing more than a well delivered apology, or do you stand your ground for which you originally asserted? And if you do allow them back, to what capacity? A movie would have us believe that this fateful re-entry would consist of the person in question running across town to stop you from boarding a train, complete with a bold declaration of love and a fistful of roses. In reality, said person often runs into you accidentally, offers you a beer and at best says they miss you. You've been through it all- you've lived, you've laughed and you've said 'I love you'- and you ended up in flames. It can never again match it's purest state, so why attempt for a less rate version that's as equally, if not more, doomed? How can you differentiate if you miss them, or the person you thought they were?

Recently it's as if every sinking ship in my life has re-emerged begging for another chance. I've sat across phones, tables and couches from these people, blanketed in comfort from the instant normalcy induced by their presence. The reunion is easy, fun and feels as if we had never been separated. But after the initial comfort comes a wave of unfamiliar sadness. They leave, the lock turns, and my heart is left as empty as the seat they just occupied. The silence in the room is louder than any laugh we just shared, screaming with the fact that no amount of time will remove the scar, and no apology will erase past pain.

The lights go off
The covers go up
&& I'm left alone with the sinking realization that I have nothing left.

Dear Diary #1

I wish my thoughts would write themselves.

The times I'm most inspired to write is when I'm at my weakest. An obvious conclusion, but all the more reason why I don't want to relieve the experience. The realization of it's actuality once written is often worse than the original occasion. A thought can be buried away, but something written must have it's existence first acknowledged, but then also dignified by discussion. Many nights I've sat up writing out everything on my mind, only to be completely erased come morning because I can't stand visual confirmation of how weak I can be. No one looks back in reverie on a time of pain or confusion, but instead often tries to downplay or completely bury the experience. Seeing your darkest thoughts by the stark daylight brings repulsion at your newly outed insecurities- something you yourself only acknowledge alone in silence since they mirror the situation from which they were formed: private, and dark. Here you keep them exactly where they belong- buried under the covers, not on a Microsoft Word document that justifies their existence and inadvertently accepts defeat.

Odd is the realization that while I despise seeing these emotions transcribed, writing of their existence is when I feel the most free. Perhaps the true stress isn't the feeling itself- but instead the fear of that feeling being found out.

My original intentions were never to reveal personal information. I viewed my channel as the place from which to escape such things, a venue where I could shape people's perception of me to be only what I wanted. Here I could ignore the shortcomings, the flaws and the pain because I could be exactly what I wanted. But as time passes I realize I no longer desire to be thought of in a perfectly put-together manner. Those flaws and those shortcomings are what comprise my difference. I'd rather be 'inspirational' for the choices I've made and the thoughts I have than fit a romanticized ideal image of who people want me to be. I am, at my base, a happy person. But I will never be the girl who is perfectly friendly, intoxicatingly sweet and entirely PG. I can be all of those things, but I am not 'that' girl. I instead am classified by a series of 'too's-' Too sarcastic. Too skinny. Too MUCH. My confidence is mistaken for cockiness and my ambivalence is thought of as arrogance. I have an attitude, but not a problem. I stick up for myself and I will put you in your place. I'd rather have my viewers see and love me for my entirety instead of a projection of a fragment of me. I am not perfect, and I don't want to be. I aim to be the most perfect version of myself- and that's who I want to be known as. 

You might wonder why someone who is revolting against 'perfection' was also the same person who had 'barbie' in her original username. In no way do I think that I am the physical embodiment of the doll. She was inspirational because she could be whatever and whoever she wanted with the change of an outfit, and you always saw her at her best- smiling, confident and beautiful. She is the ultimate actress, and that is what I viewed to be aspirational. To most, I am perpetually happy, constantly smiling and always styled. But most people who know me do not know my depths. They don't see my physical pain, my artistic mind or my emo streak. I can count on one hand the people I have opened myself up to with said information, and to them I am fiercely loyal and forever attached. They have pieces of me that I fight to keep covered- and they love me for every little one.

The thought of expanding the number of people from less than ten ..to tens of thousands.. is daunting to say the least. The possibility to be judged for your innermost thoughts and ideas with which you judge yourself is far more damaging than if someone doesn't like your dress. But the ability to influence far outweighs any potential injury. Knowing that my most appreciated videos are the ones where I've been completely honest about my imperfections is why I'm motivated to connect on a deeper level. I'd rather you like how I think than how I look, and I'd rather help someone struggling with their problems than be satisfied concealing my own. I will consider this diary a success if I can help one person feel like they are not alone.

OOTD: My Favorite Jacket

1. Sequin Jacket: IRO

2. Leather Strap Leggings: Hackley && Jameson

3. Ankle Boot: Forever 21

4. Earrings: Betsey Johnson

5. Sunglasses: Gucci

6. Patent Leather Bow Purse: Valentino

7. Rose Cuff: TJ Maxx

8. Nail Polish: 'Steel', Chanel

This is my new favorite jacket! Can you guess why?! 

WHY ARE YOU SO SPARKLY?! Ugh. So beautiful.

It has more of a gold tint to it than the pictures show,

but it is still absolutely gorgeous.

A sequin jacket might make you want

to break out into your best moonwalk-

but to avoid looking like you're channeling MJ,

keep the hair && makeup minimal.

I have a messy ponytail with hair wrapped

over the elastic, and a neutral face and lip.

Trick: Jacket/Pant combinations like this make your legs look longer!

The jacket ends slightly above your hips- so pair it with

high waisted pants to visually lengthen your legs. 

To keep this effect going, wear shoes that are the same

color- it streamlines your body by creating a line from the ground

all the way back up to your hips.

Tip for shorter torsos: Since the jacket ends at your hips, a pair of 

low rise pants would create the illusion of a longer waist-

drop your line down with your pants while raising it with

your jacket to create this length && draw attention to your

waist.

Some would say I have a sequin problem..

The only problem I have is when I'm not wearing them.